February 28, 2010

Loss of a Child and how Social Services twist things

Filed under: Secret family courts — Granarchist @ 10:41 am

For anyone losing a child is a devastating experience. Many will need help by medications to cope with their loss, counselling etc.

Some may turn to drugs or alcohol to numb the pain

Some even commit suicide

.It is recognised from the Confidential Enquiry into Motherhood and child health (CEMACH) that removal of a baby into social services accomodation is a major trigger for suicides in mothers.

Now i ask any parent reading this how you would feel if you had lost a child.

Distraught ? Tearful ? Depressed ? Like life can’t go on ?

Team that up with constant hearings , false evidence, persecution

Panic attacks , Anxiety , Stress ?

Or am i wrong ? Would you carry on regardless with none of the above ?

I write this because when a parent loses a child through bereavement people sympathise with them , it is seen as acceptable that they should feel distraught etc,

Medication to help them cope with their loss is never questioned. It is understandable as they are grieving.

Feeling suicidal is met with compassion , help and counselling .

Spare a thought for the parents that have lost a child through family courts.

They are not allowed to feel any of the above . Social services use it against them.If they are understandably upset they are then labelled as being unstable.

Dare they seek medication that is used against them.

They are not allowed to grieve .

They are not offered any counselling other than post adoption this being sometimes years after losing their child.

They are not offered any sympathy.

If they end up having a breakdown it is a case of ” i told you so “

How can anyone justify the barbaric treatment of people in this way?

Yet Social Services are allowed to mock and persecute these parents without consequence.

Even when a parent then commits suicide no blame is put on the Local Authorities.

No understanding is given to what these parents go through.

For many it is something that is never eased with time.

It isnt like normal grief it is much worse.

This seems to be something never mentioned in a Family Court room .

Instead the parents are demonised.

While fat cat experts make thousands for preparing reports .Why doesn’t one have the balls to say the truth about grief and loss and its effects?

Why doesn’t anyone show any common sense and see that it is understandable given the circumstances?

Because they are all too busy making too much money to jeopardise their own financial gain.

Social workers are all too busy covering their own backs ?

Judges are far to busy just rubber stamping decisions and lack any compassion.

Cafcass are far to busy colluding with the social workers .

There is money to be made at whatever cost .

Everyone profits from Family Court proceedings



Social Workers

Local Authorities


Adoption Agencies


Fostering Agencies


Foster Carer’s




the list is endless .

The effect on the parents and children is far less important than those involved making money.

It is a barbaric trade.



  1. Brilliantly written. x

    Comment by melthemoocher — March 8, 2012 @ 11:53 pm | Reply

  2. Well as I am typing this I’m in the midst of 1of many a bad panic attack, . . My anxiety levels are through the roof, I will admit also my emotions are all ova the place. Yet I av children who are with me & av never bn taken.. Reading this blog, & Derek I hope u don’t mind me mentioning u. My heart well aches for u all, that is something many may beg to differ , At this present moment , I av no day to day routine , I find it difficult to go out . Due to panic disorder, vertigo, social phobia I’d say now ! Brought on by Social Services. , after my plea for help as I thought it was the correct thing to do ? Inform them. But after they interigated me. I collapsed outside they building , I suffered a breakdown! If u wondering ow I still got my children, it’s coz I’m a good parent despite all that apened. , just like you are all good parents ! I’m sorry 4,ur loss yet sumtimes I feel guilty as I go on bout my feelings and I av my children.. But I should not. Iv nothing mo to say as now I feel so sad ! For my children losing a mum. & u great parents losing ur children . Bless u all x

    Comment by Beth — February 28, 2010 @ 1:04 pm | Reply

  3. Ive Had all the symptoms that you have mentioned since my daughter donna marie was kidnapped for being too happy by SCC SSs over 20 years ago now and it still breaks my heart everyday not having her or not seeing her at all i get really fed up all the time and there has been days when ive wanted to go out but ive not felt like it even if i do go out i dont enjoy myself when i see other people with there children and enjoying being with them i think why? can i not do that when i loved my daughter and still do its ever so upsetting not being able to at all i really hate being so sad everyday when its not like me and when theres been know need at all for all this heartbreak it just makes it worse i could have been happy now and my daughter would still be happy as well if she was here now if she had not been kidnapped and our very happy family had not been ruined by people who are just heart-less and do not understand why? we are so un-happy and why? we kick up such a fuss when the children that we love have been kidnapped because we love them im stupid but i know why? it breaks my heart still

    Comment by derick gibson — February 28, 2010 @ 12:21 pm | Reply

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